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As for Rivka, the recent Ivy League graduate on the Upper West Side, the push and pull between dating apps and the “human touch” played out in her own, ultimately successful, search for a mate.
For a short time while she was using JLIConnections, she also had a JSwipe account, which she deleted after a few weeks.
Weinberg advocates for the value of having an “ombudsman” in the dating-for-marriage process.
In contrast to what she characterizes as “environment of wandering,” created by apps in which daters keep seeking a more perfect person in an endless sea of possibilities and never allow a relationship to develop, a shadchan helps encourage communication and compromise to help a couple build a rapport.
In contrast, Avitan charges his clients for consultation not based on success but by the hour.
Get Jewish Week's Newsletter by email and never miss our top stories Free Sign Up Her matchmaker is part of a newly launched program called OU-JLIConnections, a partnership between the Orthodox Union’s Jewish Learning Initiative on Campus and the popular Orthodox dating site Saw You At Sinai, which relies mostly on matchmakers browsing online dating profiles.
OU-JLIConnections uses campus Jewish educators who know the students as matchmakers rather than Saw You At Sinai’s randomly assigned shadchans.
You have the human touch, not a nice person from Washington Heights, Teaneck or the Five Towns but your OU-JLIC educator.” Yoel Ackerman, who has just launched a Facebook group called “Frum Shidduch Resumes,” believes that since matchmakers are typically paid, “oftentimes, the shadchan might only have his or her own best interest in mind and is simply trying to marry you off quick without realizing that the match might not even be a good one.” Ackerman started the Facebook group in order to “to simplify the shidduch process and make it easier for Orthodox singles to date by breaking down some of the barriers that they might face.” A project begun in memory of Ackerman’s father, the group’s rules state that those looking to date for marriage should post their “shidduch resume” and only that.
Group members can reach out to each other directly if they are interested in what they see, or can ask a group administrator to reach out to someone they are interested in to see if there is a mutual spark.
Though different options work well for different people, JSwipe, he said, has resulted in “hundreds of people empowered to find love on their own, swiping in their community or worldwide,” on a scale that no individual matchmaker can parallel.