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Relationships can be a treasure trove of self-realization.
Sure, we get our connection and romantic needs met, but we also can learn a ton about ourselves and what we think love is from the partners that we choose to be with and who choose us.
But, like my friend, I too had a strong intolerance for people who were stuck in their destructive ways.
We just want to feel the feelings that we’ve been hating on.A friend of mine sometimes laments about one aspect of his relationship, which is that his girlfriend is too immature and can’t seem to deprogram the lies that her parents made her believe.While he can acknowledge that unlearning stuff from childhood that aren’t helping you is difficult, he still complains about it.Thirdly, if the situation isn’t too far gone and you stay in your relationship, you will now be much more capable in helping your partner.
Where before you would borderline berate them or play the victim, you will now be able to actually give the help and support they would need to be better.
They had these behaviors before we got together and after they forged new romances.